Status Quo
Marian encouraged everyone to break out of patterns, to stop accepting things a certain way just because that’s "company policy" or "that’s the way it’s "always been done." Everyone is conditioned not to risk too much, to play small with self-limiting thoughts.

Breaking out of these molds is not easy, but try answering questions like

• If I only had more time, I would . . .
• If I won the lottery, I would . . .
• If I could transcend this limiting belief, I would . . .

Attendees filled out a "Who Are You?" worksheet by answering questions like "What did you love to do as a child?" and "What do you love to do now? What do you find absorbing?" This exercise led to self-discovery to reacquaint attendees with what brings joy to their lives.

Swing
"Getting balance into your life is not a math problem; it’s about choices," says Marian. Choices are about defining success on your own terms. "Work. . .it don’t mean a thing if it ain’t got that swing," said Marian, where "swing" means fulfillment. When looking at what brings pure joy rather than just happiness, think about what you love, what brings passion in your life. Many times you settle into work because of what others are willing to pay for your skill set.

Gifts
Don’t let fear drive your choices. "Think of taking babysteps to proactively create more swing," said Marian. Look at who you are, what gifts you have and about sharing those gifts. Sharing those gifts may be more than getting paid for using them. Vocation and gifts don’t necessarily pay the mortgage.

Arc of empowerment
Create awareness in your life by accepting responsibility for your choices—and then learn from your choices to begin the arc again. Don’t stay on automatic pilot. Marian asked everyone to define a goal and to share it with their workshop buddy or personal coach. The coach’s role was to listen and provide a sounding board as attendees committed to taking that first babystep in a new direction. Commitments were shared, with some accountability to fulfilling those promises. Phone numbers and e-mail addresses were exchanged to continue the process after the workshop ended.

Live in the moment
Everyone has obligations that are draining them. Things that drain our lives should be . . .

• diminished
• delegated or
• dumped

"You control your response," reminded Marian. Become a singletasker. Be present in the moment. Simplify your life. Slow down. Take time to decide what really matters in your life. Make a new choice—now—today—this week.

Suggested readings

• Live Your Dream by Joyce Chapman
• Take Time for Your Life by Cheryl Richardson
• If I Could Do Anything, I Would . . . by Barbara Sher